Pam is the New York Times bestselling author of The Woman With The Blue Star, The Lost Girls of Paris, The Orphan’s Tale, The Kommandant’s Girl, The Diplomat’s Wife, The Ambassador’s Daughter, The Last Summer at Chelsea Beach, The Winter Guest, The Things We Cherished, Almost Home, and A Hidden Affair. She also authored a short story in the anthology Grand Central: Original Postwar Stories of Love and Reunion.
Life with My Idiot Family: A True Story of Survival, Courage & Justice over Childhood Sexual Abuse, Kathy Picard’s story. 10 years of abuse by her stepfather.
The Abuse and Staying Silent
The abuse started when Kathy was 7 and lasted for 10 years. The grooming for the abuse took place at around the age of 5. Her abuser and rapist was her step-father, a person who she had been raised to believe was her father. He told her real bad things would happen if she told. At the age of 9 she told her grandmother who said’ we don’t talk about those things.’ And at the age of 28 she told her Aunt Judy who believed her but didn’t want to talk about it. Kathy promised her she wouldn’t until her Aunt died. Upon her Aunt Judy’s death, Kathy told everyone. Kathy wanted to make sure that if anything happened to her, he would be the first one they would look to.
The stats are staggering:
1 in 5 girls and 1 in 20 boys are sexually abused
The average age of abuse is 12
Average disclosure age is 44
And the average years before disclosure is 32
The statute of limitations for criminal proceedings is 43
The statute of limitations for civil proceedings is 53 thank to Kathy. It had been 21 up until her fight to get it changed.
The day after the civil statute of limitations changed from 21 to 53, by a unanimous vote, Kathy, who was 53, filed charges against her stepfather. In 2015 Kathy won her civil suit. She had the courage to call him a rapist to his face in the courtroom. Kathy is now on a mission to educate children that it’s okay to tell someone and keep telling until someone listens. And to educate police departments on talking to children who have been abused. Teachers and parents, friends and family all need to listen.
Kathy Picard is an inspiring award-winning advocate. Advocating for the prevention of childhood sexual abuse. Her work centers on increasing awareness of the harsh realities of sexual child abuse. She is a survivor, public speaker and public safety trainer. Kathy won an Unsung Heroin Award, the William Pynchon Award and the Zonta International’s Founder Day Award. All for her work and advocacy in the successful reform of the Massachusetts Statute of Limitations laws regarding sex crimes against children.
A very candid conversation with Kathy:
The start of the abuse
Telling her grandmother
Not speaking out
Finally breaking the silence
Answering those who said ‘Why now? It was such a long time ago. Can’t you just let it go?’
2002 the event that encouraged her
1-800 lawyer
The fight for justice and the change in the statute of limitations
Her day in court and finally saying the words to her abuser’s face ‘rapist’
Justice for that little girl
Her advocacy work
Bold and gutsy are just two words that describe Jackie Botelho, a woman who is setting a new standard in the hospitality and event experience arenas. Jackie as never been afraid of stepping up and talking to people. She’s never been afraid to reach a goal that others told her was unachievable. Jackie has always wanted to do more. And Jackie has always known that she could do more. ‘The sky’s the limit’ is something that she has always believed in. The result was the building of Above and Beyond VIP Concierge (ABCVIP), a hospitality and event agency.
Covid changed the way that events were experienced and Jackie and her team were leading the way. Virtual gave her the opportunity to take off her heels and dig in. People who never would have attended in person events, were now experiencing them. Shy, introverted or just not wanting to be around others, Jackie gave them the opportunity to join. And let’s not forget the national exposure. No politics, no pandemic speak, just plain fun.
This week’s conversation with Jackie:
• A bold move to California
• Striking gold in California & bringing it back to NYC
• Why hospitality
• A gutsy plan and the creation of ABCVIP
• A deal with the Marriott
• Pandemic timing
• Pivoting on a dime
• Experiencing Covid
• Virtual, all those introverts and a national presence
• The naysayers – ‘I’m not listening’
• Expansion and more
Jean Shafiroff has been called ‘The First Lady of Philanthropy’. She has spent a lifetime doing charitable work. And it all started when she was a child, learning from her parents.
After her first daughter was born, Jean made the decision to be a stay-at-home mom. As she says, she was lucky to be able to do so. And as a result, she volunteered at the school. This allowed her to spend time with her daughter and help out with school functions and fundraising. A start which turned into a career of philanthropy. At times you could find Jean on the boards of seven charities at once.
Philanthropist, author, human rights and animal rights advocate and socialite, Jean serves on multiple national and regional philanthropic boards. She is the ambassador and spokesperson for American Humane Feed the Hungry Covid-18 Program. Jean is the host of ‘Successful Philanthropy, a TV show on LTV. She is also the author of ‘Successful Philanthropy: How to Make a Life By What You Give’.
Jean serves on the boards of the South Hampton Hospital Association, NYC Mission Society, French Heritage Society, Couture Council of the Museum at FIT, Global Strays, Jewish Board (Honorary Trustee), and Southampton Animal Shelter Foundation Honorary Board. She is a New York Women’s Foundation Board Alumna and remains very active with the Foundation and women’s issues.
Jean holds two degrees: a BS in Physical Therapy from the College of Physicians and Surgeons at Columbia University and an MBA in finance from Columbia Business School at Columbia University. She resides in Manhattan and Southampton with her family.
A conversation with Jean:
The beginnings of philanthropy
Stay-at-home decision and volunteering
Starting off small
Making a difference
Choosing what’s right for you
But I can only give an hour…
Fashion and parties and loosening up the crowd
The fashion industry and the pandemic
The pandemic and the change
Feed the Hungry Covid-19 Program
Daughters following in mom’s footsteps
A message
When I started talking to Abby, I went into the conversation with the idea that I would be talking to someone who was funny. And for sure, she is. Funny, warm and able to talk candidly about herself. So candidly, that I knew this is exactly the conversation needed for so many. With much humor and humility, Abby speaks about her own struggles. Her struggles with an eating disorder, her intimidation of those who are supposed to be in the know and how improv and comedy helped her hide. And how she finally took control. Control that she is not letting go of.
“Anything I should know before I go home?” I asked the chief cardiologist, trying not to sound terrified.
“Just don’t lift stuff over 10 pounds for a few weeks.”
“My baby is over 10 pounds.”
Abby refers to herself as a performer, obsessive compulsive comedian, writer and mom. She wrote and performed with The Second City, The Upright Citizen’s Brigade, HBO, Nick Jr., and NPR. And the first all-female improv group found Abby among its performers.
Abby’s essays have appeared in The New York Times, Self, Jane, and Elle. One was adapted for the television series Modern Love. Abby currently co-hosts the Chucklepath Comedy Show with Molly Reisner. She is the author of five books including Miss You Love You Hate You Bye, named a 2020 Buzzfeed Best Book for Mental Health Awareness Month. And Abby most recently co-authored Sanctuary, a YA (Young Adult) dystopian novel.
A candid conversation with Abby:
The start of being funny
Why improv – putting it out there
Not being ‘precious’ about it
1st improv female group
Performer, comedian and mom – how about SpongeBob
Mental health issues
A reckoning and getting help
Finding solace in writing
Personal essays
Young adults, rock bottom and friendship
Miss You Love You Hate You Bye – friendship and mental health
Finding confidence to speak up – knowing your own body
